Saturday, July 28, 2007

Dear Friends,

This has been an intense week but has ended on a positive note. It was an extremely difficult Monday morning as we tried to get Kevin ready for his trip to Bakersfield. He had been in a good frame of mind earlier that morning but as we began preparations to get him dressed to go, his frame of mind dramatically changed. I won't go into the gory details, but it took us nearly two hours to get him dressed and out to the van. Sarah and I were a bit dismayed when we discovered it was two young ladies who would be transporting him instead of sturdy men, but they took it all in stride as they had handled this sort of situation many times. The one lady had to literally hold Kevin down for the first hour and a half of the trip to keep him from unbuckling his seat belt as he tried to escape. Poor Sarah sat in front completely helpless as the drama was going on behind her. In her own words, "It was a very traumatic trip".

Kevin was initially taken to the clinic (I'm not really sure what happened there) but shortly thereafter was taken to his apartment. Everett and I arrived shortly after that. Kevin was still in a bad frame of mind and was, understandably, very upset about everything that had transpired and was not about to cooperate with anything. The rest of the evening continued on pretty much the same note.

Tuesday morning we arrived at the clinic at 9:00 am as this was when Kevin was supposed to arrive, but he had had a difficult morning and so was an hour late arriving. We were allowed to follow him around all day as he went to a different therapy each hour. The day was emotionally exhausting. I don't want to go into the details of it but we were very much impressed with how professional and caring the staff was as they worked with Kevin. After six hours of this, which included an hour lunch break, he was taken back to his apartment where his difficult behavior continued.

During our day on Tuesday we were able to meet with Joe, Kevin's counselor. We were delighted to find that Joe is a Christian with beliefs in line with ours. He is not normally able to give Biblical counsel to the clients (Kevin is regarded as a client, not a patient) unless it is okay with the family and/or client. We were, of course, okay with it. We felt Joe was going to be very good for Kevin.

Wednesday morning we arrived at the Centre a little late and found that Kevin was having his first session with Joe. Joe met with Kevin one-on-one the first hour and then we were called in to be with them the second hour. We were completely amazed at the transformation as we came in and saw Kevin calmly sitting there able to communicate reasonably well. Joe held no punches as he explained to Kevin what had happened to him and what was expected of him before he could leave the Centre. We were also given vivid mental pictures that gave us only a little taste of a taste of what Kevin was going to have to deal with. I dare say most of us could not handle what he will have to put up with. He is basically a prisoner having to do exactly what his therapists, aids, and doctors, etc., tell him to do and do it with complete compliance 24 hours a day. Because of his unstable balance, he has to have an aid or therapist within an arm's length at all times and this includes shower time. He has practically no privacy. Hopefully this invasion of his privacy will lessen as his balance improves. Also, he was measured for a cane to aid him which he should receive by Monday. We still believe his imbalance is due to his eyesight. It is more and more clear that he is pretty much blind in the right eye and there is possibly deficiency in the left eye. They will get him to a neuro eye specialist asap to try and determine the cause of the eye damage as to whether it is related to nerve, muscle, or other damage and see if it can be fixed in some way. Please keep this matter in your prayers.

The rest of the day went very smoothly as Kevin complied with all his therapists. He even had us and the therapists laughing as he kept making jokes about what was going on. It was so good to see a bit of the old Kevin popping through. That afternoon and evening his better attitude and demeanor continued at the apartment. His aid fixed his dinner and he thanked her over and over for preparing it for him. He even helped with the trash. We had a nice visit with him that evening.

Thursday continued along very well, too. We stayed with him through lunch and then had to get back on the road. We have talked to him a couple times on the phone since we left and all seems to be going well. He went on an ice cream social with the other clients in his apartment Friday evening and this morning they took him grocery shopping.

Friday he was moved to a different apartment as the other client in his first apartment has some violent tendencies and needs to be by himself. Kevin didn't seem to mind the move and is now in an apartment with two other clients who are in about the same condition as himself. Hopefully this will give him some opportunity to socialize.

We will return the the Centre next Friday and spend the weekend. On Friday we will have our first scheduled family conference where we hope to have more conclusive input on Kevin's condition, what kind of personalized rehabilitation they have planned for him, what kind of prognosis we might expect, and how long he might have to be there.

For those of you who would like to send a card or note of encouragement to Kevin, you can do so by sending it to:

Kevin Hollar
2500 Gosford Road, Apt. 212
Bakersfield, CA 93309

I have gone through the loss of my mother due to brain cancer and Everett has gone through the loss of both parents and a sister but the pain of those losses don't come close to the pain we are going through as we watch our son endure this horrific injury. People often ask us how we are doing but there are just no words to describe the pain in our hearts. We are holding up by the grace of God as well as to the grace of God. Please keep us all in your prayers.

Love,
Tami